When a husband yearns to be a bachelor again after 32 years, his wife writes to Cutie seeking some grandmotherly wisdom. Is the marriage doomed, or is this just a bump in their long journey together? Tune in to find out why Cutie says "Hold on with your teeth."

A fan writes in with a serious problem: her nearly-23-year-old husband doesn't want to work! This is definitely a job for Cutie, who tells it like it is about the responsibilities of marriage, and the alternate options for a husband who thinks it's too tough to be a man.( And stay tuned to the end, for a cute outtake featuring Pop Pop.)

Since she was a young girl, Cutie has felt a kinship with the Fleischer Brothers' sexy, sassy cartoon vixen Betty Boop, collecting a select amount of Boop-abillia and throwing Boopisms into casual conversation. Her granddaughters took the occasion of finding her chilling in a Betty Boop sweatshirt and matching baseball cap to ask: "What's it all about, Cutie?" The answer surprised them, but it shouldn't have, considering Cutie's decades in the shoe business: it's the slippers that send her.

Do you have a burning problem that only Grandma can solve? If so, send out a distress signal and if she can help you, she certainly will. In today's episode, three young women with very different problems reach out to their internet grandma, asking her advice about deadbeat house guests, children versus career worries, and how to have a modern American life without alienating one's old world parents. Does Cutie have the answers? What do you think?

This is a direct transcription of Cutie's response to watching Lady Gaga's latest video, "Alejandro."

You want me to review this? Throw it away and start shooting all over again. It had no continuation, it had no charm, it had no storyline. It's just a bunch of stuff, mostly cuts from the 1930s. I think it's nothing new, it's nothing charming. It's got no message. I'm sorry, I did not enjoy this. It was a take off of flappers. But flappers were more consistent and more fun. This was not fun. I think she doesn't come across with reaching the public emotionally. She's just -- there.

[Cutie, did you find the imagery shocking?] Shocked? I'm annoyed. She was a waste of my time. I'm sorry, maybe the whole world thinks she's great, and people who know talent will recognize what she has got to offer. She isn't doing anything new. It's the same thing that we have seen, only take offs.

[Cutie, do you have some constructive criticism for Lady Gaga?] Sure. Lady Gaga, get yourself a good agent and go to school and get some talent! What? I think that's constructive criticism!

[UPDATE: Later, Cutie hopes she hasn't hurt Lady Gaga's feelings, and sends her a personal message, which you can see at http://www.the-ogs.com/messagetogaga ]

Oh Harry, Oh Harry, How you can Love. Oh Harry, Oh Harry heaven above. My mother wants to know just when you and I can get together and so so. So Harry, So Harry, How about it? That's what it's all about. We can Something or other and something or other. Oh Harry, Oh Harry. How I love you so.

I used to sing that song when I was very, very young. I think originally it was an American song. It was Oh Johnny, Oh Johnny, How you can Love. The Whole world seems to shine.I don't remember how to make it rhyme. Oh Johnny, I love you so...

I just sang this song to Harry when I looked at this picture of us at our old house. Just to show you I'm holding on to the right guy.

I can't believe it's taken me this long to tell you what I think of the Olive Garden!

Well, in case you were wondering, I love it. You go there for continuous soup and salad, and soup and salad make a beautiful lunch. I usually have the veggie minestrone. By yourself or with some friends, it's a nice place, priced well, very neat and clean, and consistently good. The help is nice, too, and that's particularly important to me, because I am not the world's easiest customer. The bubbe has needs, and expects them to be met... with a smile!

But back to the food. The salads are very good, too, because they are very simple, and if you want more they automatically bring you more. Here's how we used to do it when we lived in Ventura County: Harry would have the soup, I would have the salad, and we'd eat our fill. It cut our expenses. Now I don't know if they knew we were switching plates when we got sick of one thing, or if they'd like it if they did know. I guess they must have known, but because the help is nice (which as you know is particularly important to me) no one ever said anything about it. Soup and salad is a very adequate lunch, and you'll find no more adequate one than at the Olive Garden. I think I'd like to go back some time, even though we eat very well at Hollenbeck. See you there!

For more of grandma's reviews, visit her on Yelp http://barbaracooper.yelp.com

Grandchild: Grandma, are you watching the Michael Jackson memorial? What's happening?

Grandma: There's speeches and it seems to be under control. Steve Wonder is singing right now, and I wanted to hear Michael's voice. I'm not so familiar with his solo voice, just his music. I'm not mourning because I didn't know him that well, it's the younger generations who are into him. But I feel bad that someone who was so well loved died so young.

Every savvy Angeleno knows that the Downtown LA Art Walk is the best thing to happen to the Historic Core since the Red Cars stopped running, and recently grandma came down to see for herself what all the fuss was about. But rather than fight the crowds on Main Street, she opted for a comfy seat on the free Hippodrome Shuttle, where she gave some of her patented instant love advice between serenades from her dear friend The Ukulady. Also on the bus, Crimebo the Crime Clown, the world's most inappropriate entertainer. It was a wonderful adventure, and we've saved a snippet of it just for you. So give us a friend heart (that's a heart made of hands) and enter Cutie's world...

What a neat surprise for Grandma to find her inbox filled with compliments and friend requests from fellow Yelpers early on a Saturday morning. Why so popular? It seems her review of Philippe The Original was named Review of the Day for the whole Los Angeles review site! If you stay opinionated for 90-something years, it can happen to you, too.