Darling Cutie,
I have been dating an older man (I’m 27, he’s 40) off and on for about three years and we recently got engaged. This man is caring, loving, loyal and providing and my best friend
My family and his are extremely excited that we are engaged and I have no doubt in my mind he will be a great husband and maybe even a fantastic father one day. But recently I have been having MAJOR anxiety over us getting married. Here is why:
1. We don’t have sex often. He wants to but in the last year I have majorly lost my sexual desire with him. Is this normal? Should we not getting married because of this?
2. Is our age difference too big to realistically make a marriage work?
3. I have anxiety thinking married life is going to be boring.
Are these signs that I should be paying closer attention to, or am I just being a worry-wart (which I am known to be)? Is there always over anxiety before getting married?
sincerely,
Stressed Out
Dear Stressed Out,
My answer is an emphatic YES– you should slow down and heed the signs. You have concerns and this does not make you a bad person. You can care for him, even love him, but that does not mean you are ready to settle down just yet.Â
Why not take an afternoon to just consider the options? The truth is that married life can be as exciting or as boring as you want it to be. If you are interested in going out and being a young, single gal, then you may not be happy with what marriage has to offer. But, if you are ready to marry and commit your life to another person, you have a whole world of fun in store for you. You can still be your own person in the relationship. You can go out with your girlfriends. But it is different once you marry. Be sure that this is what you want.
Be honest with yourself about what you need at this stage of your life. The worst thing you can do is go into something when your heart is somewhere else.
love,
Cutie
Darling Cutie,
I have been dating an older man (I’m 27, he’s 40) off and on for about three years and we recently got engaged. This man is caring, loving, loyal and providing and my best friend
My family and his are extremely excited that we are engaged and I have no doubt in my mind he will be a great husband and maybe even a fantastic father one day. But recently I have been having MAJOR anxiety over us getting married. Here is why:
1. We don’t have sex often. He wants to but in the last year I have majorly lost my sexual desire with him. Is this normal? Should we not getting married because of this?
2. Is our age difference too big to realistically make a marriage work?
3. I have anxiety thinking married life is going to be boring.
Are these signs that I should be paying closer attention to, or am I just being a worry-wart (which I am known to be)? Is there always over anxiety before getting married?
sincerely,
Stressed Out
Dear Stressed Out,
My answer is an emphatic YES– you should slow down and heed the signs. You have concerns and this does not make you a bad person. You can care for him, even love him, but that does not mean you are ready to settle down just yet.Â
Why not take an afternoon to just consider the options? The truth is that married life can be as exciting or as boring as you want it to be. If you are interested in going out and being a young, single gal, then you may not be happy with what marriage has to offer. But, if you are ready to marry and commit your life to another person, you have a whole world of fun in store for you. You can still be your own person in the relationship. You can go out with your girlfriends. But it is different once you marry. Be sure that this is what you want.
Be honest with yourself about what you need at this stage of your life. The worst thing you can do is go into something when your heart is somewhere else.
love,
Cutie