Dear Cutie,
I’m an early 30s woman who has just left a seven year relationship. Â We always had a lot of fun and a strong chemistry, but about two years ago I learned he was having an emotional affair with another woman. Â
It hurt me a lot to lose my friend to someone else. We argued about it. He always said he loved me and he would end that relationship to be with me, however it was hard for me to feel confident in our relationship again. Plus, that relationship never really did end, as far as I know. I finally became strong enough to leave our relationship, even though it’s not the way I wanted things to go. Now he admits having relationship issues he’d like to work out–he comes from a divorced family. He is going to therapy and wants me to go with him. He insists he wants to work things out with me.
Is this worth trying to work things out? Will our relationship really be stronger and heal with professional help? Or is it just time for me to start
fresh?
signed,
Wavering
Dear Wavering,
You’ve got to decide for yourself whether this relationship is worth trying to save. It sounds like you are hurt by his behavior and it is going to take a lot of work on his part to gain back your confidence. Are you interested in walking this path with him? There is no shame in walking away from a relationship that has not fulfilled you.
There are people out there who can respect you in a relationship. He may not be there yet. Take some time away from him to think about your options, and then make the choice that feels right for you right now.Â
Love,
Cutie
Dear Cutie,
I’m an early 30s woman who has just left a seven year relationship. Â We always had a lot of fun and a strong chemistry, but about two years ago I learned he was having an emotional affair with another woman. Â
It hurt me a lot to lose my friend to someone else. We argued about it. He always said he loved me and he would end that relationship to be with me, however it was hard for me to feel confident in our relationship again. Plus, that relationship never really did end, as far as I know. I finally became strong enough to leave our relationship, even though it’s not the way I wanted things to go. Now he admits having relationship issues he’d like to work out–he comes from a divorced family. He is going to therapy and wants me to go with him. He insists he wants to work things out with me.
Is this worth trying to work things out? Will our relationship really be stronger and heal with professional help? Or is it just time for me to start
fresh?
signed,
Wavering
Dear Wavering,
You’ve got to decide for yourself whether this relationship is worth trying to save. It sounds like you are hurt by his behavior and it is going to take a lot of work on his part to gain back your confidence. Are you interested in walking this path with him? There is no shame in walking away from a relationship that has not fulfilled you.
There are people out there who can respect you in a relationship. He may not be there yet. Take some time away from him to think about your options, and then make the choice that feels right for you right now.Â
Love,
Cutie